'Out of the Obstacle Lies the Solution'

'Out of the Obstacle Lies the Solution'

Q:

How do you find positivity in a negativity? Your vibe always seem to show a very light and positive one. all smiles :)

A:

Thank you very much for your question! To be completely honest, I don’t try to find positivity in negativity. There is way too much focus in the world today on always being super duper happy(!!!) and killing it(!!!) and hacking your way to happiness(!!!!). This has always bothered me a lot – it invalidates real human emotion and struggle. We are not wired to always be happy, and I have 100 percent of the time found that my periods of greatest self-growth come out of my hardest struggles.

When things are really tough for me, I sit with the problem and I try and work it through. I pay attention to my emotional reactions, and break it down into workable pieces. I talk to my husband, my friends and family, my therapist - basically anyone who I draw support from. Then I just sit with it and try to see the other end. This process can take a long time, and it isn’t fun. But it is crucial. I feel like so many people just push their pain deep down and try to ignore it. This can never end well. Distraction is not a coping technique I have had success with, things grow fangs and come back to bite you harder. Regular meditation and exercise have always helped me along when processing sadness, and I do not do the instagram scroll. I use the app, but I get in, post, and get out. It is too much of an energy stealer for me – I find it brings me more distraction and hang ups than joy.

I am an optimist by nature, and do make the choice to see the bright side of things when pressed. However I want you to remember that social media is not real. I only share the things that I want to share – and I want to share happiness, not sadness. I am not the only person online doing this, so don’t get fooled into thinking that everyone else out there is killing it and super duper stoked on life! We are all human with real problems that we don’t share with our followers.

Out of the obstacle lies the solution; in the shadows lies the most gold. I love these two quotes. Don’t be afraid to be sad, endure the discomfort and you will find your own happiness and strength.

Love,

Bridget