To struggle is to be human. It is through our hardest of times that we grow and are shaped into the people we want to be in the world. It really fucking sucks, and can hurt more than we ever knew possible, but it teaches us so much about what we are capable of. Looking back, I realize just how I have been shaped by the tough times in my life. And through refusing to shove the experiences down, through forcing myself to acknowledge them for what they are I have learned what I am truly capable of.
It is this facing your demons instead of running that is the important thing here. I feel like we spend so much time with our head in the sand, blaming our problems on other people and situations. We are running on autopilot; taking the medication to help us wake up and help us sleep, looking at the world through a screen, eating the food that is laced with chemicals, and watching other peoples fake realities on TV. We aren’t showing up to our own lives, to the struggle that exists fully with our realities.
Because it is this struggle that truly makes you appreciate life. Without knowing the back, how can you truly know the front? If your life is all rainbows and false memories, you will either live a hollow existence, void of actual human connection, or you are headed for a break down. The shadow cannot be ignored – eventually it will make itself heard. And it probably will not be pretty.
So today try something that scares the shit out of you. Force yourself out of your comfort zone – talk to the stranger, sign up for a class you know nothing about, turn off your phone for an entire day, try a new workout, face that person who has not been holding up their end of the relationship. Make yourself experience something new and daunting. Because you never know what will come of it; our anxiety is all based around future events, and usually isn’t oriented in logic and reality. So challenge the norm and face your life head on. There is always another option; we may be creatures of habit, but new habits can open up so many doors.
And when the going gets tough, face up to it. Don’t go running away, taking medication and blaming other people. Sit with the uncomfortable feelings, ask them questions, write it out, and stare the fear down in the eyes. A life where everything that isn’t what you want you consider bad, is no life at all. So don’t let it be. Turn up to your life, and your life will turn up for you.